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Refugees Fleeing Torture ‘Wimps’

filthy refugees on a filthy boat

Asylum seekers, refugees and all immigrants that look a bit tanned are just cowards too scared of getting their genitalia hacked off, David Cameron told a group of Daily Mail readers yesterday.

The Prime Minister confirmed that anyone now arriving in Britain without a valid skin tone would be sent back to Bongo Bongo Land, or wherever jungle they came from.

“They smell don’t they? They’re definitely not hygienic,” Cameron announced.

“They need to integrate more, maybe join one of our very welcoming, traditional community groups like the English Defence League, or the Hell’s Angels.

“Cause if they don’t, we’re going to throw them out of an aeroplane somewhere near Calais.

“The filthy fucking frogs.”

Cameron said he thought it was wrong that so many foreigners were better at doing our jobs than we were, but it was also our own fault for getting made redundant.

“Whoever came up with this idea of an open jobs market, what a pleb,” Mr Cameron coughed.

“It’s not what free enterprise is all about. No one should be given an equal chance in our British society, least of all those backward folk from countries that we battered for hundreds of years by wave after wave of imperialist rape, murder, slavery, warfare and torture.

“They’re just wimps basically.”

The Conservative Party leader’s comments have pleased the official spokeswoman for the north of England, Gillian Duffy, who hates everyone. Even herself.

“Get ’em out,” she spluttered. “No one deserves to live ‘ere. Except Alan Titchmarsh, he’s lovely.

“Maybe if we left him here on his own he could make a water feature out of Rochdale.”


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