Jim Davidson Has Not Been Jailed
The former Big Break and Generation Game host and alleged comedian has not been seen or heard from for years, but this is not because he has been banged up for child sex offences.
Nor has he been incarcerated for any other crime, the Metropolitan Police admitted today.
“We can confirm that shortly after 6pm this evening a sad, four-times-divorced 59-year-old bigot who goes by the name Jim Davidson was not being held in custody,” a Met spokesman soberly explained.
“Although his name has been mentioned on numerous occasions with respect to Operation Yewtree, and despite our detectives arresting him this year and asking questions connected to this complex and long-running investigation, Davidson has not been charged with any offence.
“No, not even rape.”
Among the laws under which Davidson has yet to be convicted are the Sex Offences Act, Disability Discrimination Act, Race Relations Act, Sex Discrimination Act, Equality Act and Trade Descriptions Act.
The homophobe has also not been charged with any offence under the Terrorism Act, despite dedicating his entire career to the incitement of hatred.
Following the news this evening shocked members of the public took to Twitter to express their rage.
“OMG. Big Break for Jim Davidson. Can’t believe no-one noticed him knocking all those blacks,” said one.
“Jim Davidson obviously knows how to play the Generation Game. Teddy bears = good bribes #WatchYourKids,” added another.
Other high-profile zealots who have not yet been charged under Operation Yewtree – the Met Police investigation into the sexual abuse of children by Jimmy Savile and others who may or may not also be called Jim – include Des Lynam, Jeremy Clarkson and the Duke of Edinburgh.