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We are winning the war against climate change propaganda

Sir David AttenboroughA quite incredible event happened last week, and for once, the media barely took notice.

The publication of a report warning of a global cataclysm was quite sensationally ignored by Britain’s newspapers. Rather than indicating the mass media’s inherent pro-corporate bias and preoccupation with trivial nonsense, however, this finally proves that we are winning the war against climate change propaganda.

Monday

Eat that, George Monbiot. Go fuck yourself, Sir David Attenborough. Man-made climate change is a load of bullshit and at last the press has cottoned on. When the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) issued its latest comprehensive tome of tosh, it barely even got a mention, anywhere. Even The Independent only put it on Page 7. Finally, journalists are recognising climate change for what it is: Unimportant. This is real progress.

Tuesday

If you’re wondering, the IPCC are the same bunch of doped-up delinquents who tried to con us back in 2007 by claiming the Himalayas were about to melt, but got found out and were forced apologise. Now everyone’s rightly ignoring their latest report and is focussing on more important stories such as how stupid One Direction fans are, or whether or not a TV presenter’s daughter has recovered from non-life threatening injuries.

Wednesday

Now I happen to think One Direction are as irrelevant as a lump of mash potato, but that still makes them more relevant than climate change. Thankfully, the media now agrees. So does this mean we can all just forget about it now and move on? I don’t want to get ahead of myself here, but yes, it definitely does. No-one, least of all weathermen like myself, should ever, EVER have to mention the C words again.

Thursday

In a roundabout way then, I guess maybe the IPCC’s latest report was actually a landmark. A landmark last gasp for a hoax that has been allowed to linger for far too long. From this week hence forth, the myth has been busted, the truth exposed and the planet finally saved from hyperbole and exaggeration.

Friday

Fucking hell it’s been a warm autumn hasn’t it?



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