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Poo On The Queen

Her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth II has been covered by faeces.

The excrement is positioned on the monarch’s head but has also splattered on to other areas of her well-dressed anatomy, as well as to one or more of Her Majesty’s close relatives.

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Fat Cats Lose Fight To Occupy City Of London

The British people have won their High Court bid to evict occupying kleptocrats from the City of London.

Laundering businessmen of the City, who protect the interests of the wealthy elite through an unaccountable plutocracy and a coterie of security personnel, have been squatting on our land since the 12th Century.

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I’ve submitted an application form to Dragon’s Den

Spring has arrived at last. But even better than that, the patent has come through on my idea that will save the world. Yes, that’s right. I, Jim Wetherman, am ready to launch the Big World Saving Plan.

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I’m quietly formulating a plan to save the world

I’ve been thinking a lot over the summer about how humans are influencing our climate; what with all the floods, heatwaves and volcanic eruptions we’ve had. I’m even formulating a plan to save the world. But more on that later.

In the meantime, I need to concentrate on forecasting this week’s weather. All of those juicy, ripe blackberries. All of those golden, autumn leaves, falling, spiralling down to the crisp, frost-biten floor. And a fresh, cool wind blows. Yes, I definitely fucking hate this time of year.

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Clegg’s “Sorrow” for Cuts Abuse Victims

Nick Clegg says he is deeply sorry for the public spending scandal that has hit his party this year, but has vowed to continue increasing unemployment and spreading Aids around the world because “it is the right thing to do”.

Speaking at the Liberal Democrat conference in Liverpool, the defiant Deputy Prime Minister said that the government’s public sector cuts were “regrettable” but “entirely necessary” if the coalition was to succeed in ridding Britain of homosexual sin.

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It’s good to hate!

Are you xenophobic, racist and/or fascist? Fed up with foreigners taking your jobs, raping your wives and fitting your kitchens?

Do you feel increasingly isolated in a country that is now basically a Muslim state full of people from Bongo Bongo Land?

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