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Rumsfeld Appointed As New Attack Secretary

US president George W. Bush has responded to devastating defeats in the polls this week by appointing ex defence secretary, Donald Rumsfeld, into the newly-created position of ‘attack secretary’.

Rumsfeld, who resigned on Wednesday, was hastily brought back into the administration on Thursday by the president as he announced his new exit strategy from Iraq.

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Alarm Clocks ‘Bad for Your Health’

The use of alarm clocks to wake us up in the morning may be bad for our long-term health, according to a new study.

Research into the effects of sleep disturbance has been conducted by first year students on the sleep management degree course at Bullshit University.

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