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Caught in the middle

The battleground for the future of humanity has been clearly marked.

On one side are the masses, a vast majority of the population of the globe, armed with nothing but their own passion, energy, heart and intelligence.

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Government Vision for Greenless Britain

Great Britain will be tarmacked and covered by giant advertising hoardings that can be seen by air passengers from 30,000 feet in new plans announced by the government today.

Every last inch of green space on these islands will be sold off in a bid by the Department for Communities and Local Government to “get Britain’s economy growing again”.

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This British spring is an absolute scorcher

I’m so glad winter has finally passed, I tell you, after losing £31.8billion in Las Vegas, the freezing downpours of the last few months took me to the brink of suicide.

But now spring has firmly announced its presence, I am looking forward to a long, hot summer. The kind of summer where you can fry eggs on the pavement and ‘accidentally’ poison your wife. Life is good.

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Who’s cheating whom?

For every poor man who steals a penny, a rich man robs a pound and sells it back to us for a tenner.

The mass media aims a gun at the poor man and gives the rich man a free holiday.

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Britain lives or dies by its decision today

Given the choice, would you rather live or die? Swim or drown? Breathe or suffocate? Change something for the better, or keep it the same?

Today, Britain has this decision to make. The first step toward a brighter future, or the permanency of this dark, cold, sterile present.

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Refugees Fleeing Torture ‘Wimps’

Asylum seekers, refugees and all immigrants that look a bit tanned are just cowards too scared of getting their genitalia hacked off, David Cameron told a group of Daily Mail readers yesterday.

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