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Refugees Fleeing Torture ‘Wimps’

Asylum seekers, refugees and all immigrants that look a bit tanned are just cowards too scared of getting their genitalia hacked off, David Cameron told a group of Daily Mail readers yesterday.


Lies, damned lies and a Liberal Con

After the election of 2005, I wrote an obituary for British democracy. Now in 2010, we are promised that things will change.

Clegg and Cameron tell us our democracy will be revived, resurrected, reformed. We want to believe them, but something’s stopping us. It’s the lies. The big stinking pile of lies.


Give us our country back

In a land now largely owned and leased back from corporations, the role of the state could not be in more doubt.

From Thatcher to Major to Blair to Brown, the transfer of our public services to private enterprise has proceeded unabated for over 30 years. It is likely to continue, whoever wins on 6th May. But is it really important who serves us? So long as we get what we need, does it matter if the water we drink is contaminated with greed?


One-In-1000-Year Events Now Happening Every Friday

A millennium is now happening every seven days, weather forecasters have confirmed.

Weeks have turned to seconds, months to minutes, and in another couple of days Britain is due to receive its average annual rainfall in the same time it takes a local news reporter to put their wellies on.


Wind Turbine Objectors Okay With Pylons, PVC Conservatories, Deforestation, More

Vociferous campaigners against plans to build a wind farm in Middle England say they have no problem with 50-metre electricity pylons, nor anything else that has been forcibly added to or taken away from the rural landscape over the last 10,000 years since man first settled on this forested island.

The new windmills proposed for erection upon one of Britain’s best-loved patches of grass may provide enough clean, renewable energy to power five billion patio heaters and at least two-and-a-half billion garden water features, but the Campaign against Upstanding New Turbine Structures (Cunts) is not satisfied the suggested benefits will offset the damage to a landscape admired for its unnecessary street lamps, oversized conservatories, agricultural scarring and historical deforestation.


The Telegraph Files: Reporters’ Shoddy Journalism Techniques Revealed

Journalists at the Daily Telegraph are today implicated by The Taxman, as documents bought at a local newsagent reveal just how darn shoddy they really are.

In exchange for 90p that we would argue was 90p too much, the documents clearly show the depths to which this one-time bastion of good practice and journalistic heritage has plummeted in order to start shifting papers.

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