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Caught in the middle

The battleground for the future of humanity has been clearly marked.

On one side are the masses, a vast majority of the population of the globe, armed with nothing but their own passion, energy, heart and intelligence.

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One day all of this could be yours

Does anyone need to ask why a few dozen people have set up camp outside a cathedral in London in the middle of October?

Does anyone need to question their goals, their demands, who they are, where they come from or what solutions they have to all of the world’s problems?

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This British spring is an absolute scorcher

I’m so glad winter has finally passed, I tell you, after losing £31.8billion in Las Vegas, the freezing downpours of the last few months took me to the brink of suicide.

But now spring has firmly announced its presence, I am looking forward to a long, hot summer. The kind of summer where you can fry eggs on the pavement and ‘accidentally’ poison your wife. Life is good.

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Fuck the government, fuck you all

I need to be honest. I have no clue what the weather’s going to be like this week.

It will probably rain, it could equally be dry, maybe a bit of both, a little snow, some hail, a few cats, the odd dog and my uncle Sam. One thing I do know is, there’s a big black cloud hanging over my life.

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Nothing At All Happening In the World Right Now, Confirms British Media

Absolutely nothing, nada, zilch is occurring in any of the world’s 195 countries, according to British media outlets.

No-one is dying of disease and/or starvation, no-one’s army is invading and/or occupying anyone’s country and no-one’s economy is about to collapse. Whatsoever.

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BBC Denies Bias Towards the Truth

The director-general of the BBC has moved to quell the latest furore over the corporation’s impartiality by categorically denying any bias towards honest, fact-based journalism.

Mark Thompson’s secretary explained in a statement today that the BBC‘s constitution forbids it from presenting anything close to an accurate representation of what is actually happening in the world.

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