There’s just nothing left to rib
This takes the bacon.
We, ham at The Taxman, have worked incredibly hard over the years to bring you the truth. The hilarious truth.
So maybe we did tell a few porkies, but it was still hilarious. And it still revealed more truth than any other newspaper could gammon.
Today, that satirical heritage, all 11 years of it, has come to mean absolutely snout.
There are simply sow more jokes left to make that can even come close to matching what the mainstream press is now snorting.
The writing was on the wall last week when, much to my astonishment, a left-wing sausage became leader of the opposition.
And now, we get this crackling.
Well, that’s your trotter. No more trough from me. I hereby tenderloin my resignation.
That’s right. It’s over. And you know what? I don’t give a spam. I’ve no swine for satire anymore. And why should I? None of you ever gave a chops about this piece of fucking a pig in the face anyway.
The Taxman‘s dead. Thanks for reading folks, it’s been a hoof.